Jawbone

When loving you patiently
I find myself gritting my teeth
because I think I know best,
when I don’t know at how to love you yet at all.

I know how I have loved in the past
and how I have been loved,
but to love you?
You?
Someone so new.
I don’t know.
How dare I even pretend to.

We are as raw as a kitten in a snowstorm.
Blinded by the birth into being
cold and also hungry
we exist with simple desires:
connection
warmth
kindness
companionship.

Later, perhaps, when the foundation has been formed
hardened
and tested by the elements
we will know how to love another more fully.
Or at least with more patience.

Until then, I will continue to grit my teeth
and hope that my jaw will unhinge
with words of friendship and wonder
and none of the frustration
I feel with myself when I love you
in only the ways I think best.

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